Posts belonging to Category Time Management Tips

How Do You Learn to Feel Good About Yourself

How do you learn to feel good about yourself?

That’s a good question.  It fills a ton of websites with all kinds of “how tos” from the world of self-help to that of  psychology and psychiatry to personal development  and there are a host of books on Amazon – it seems that it’s an issue for a lot of people.  I had no idea it was such a common problem.

Sometimes though, lessons come in the strangest “packages” and at the oddest moments.

Last night, the movie Forrest Gump was on.  I’d watched it a couple of times before because it’s just one of those movies that’s a little “old fashioned” – it has a happy ending.

As I watching Forrest Gump, it finally dawned on me that this movie was actually a lesson in “how to feel good about oneself”. In fact, it was probably the best way for people to really understand what feeling good about yourself is all about – what it looks like, feels like and is .

Forrest Gump (Two-Disc Special Collector’s Edition)

Here’s a man who, despite people’s opinion of him accomplishes what most of us would consider a highly successful life in all ways. This man who is ridiculed or approached in not such kind ways, navigates his way through life expressing himself and his character in a fashion which would make any mother proud.

He is – loving — loyal —- faithful —-  dependable —- motivational —- kind —  generous —- determined —- hardworking —- honest and, by any definition, an exemplary son, friend, soldier, businessman, husband and father —–  yet, he is according to him, “not a smart man”!

He is, however, very, very special – he knows his limitations, society’s view of his disability and . . . yet . . . he feels good about who he is! It is a lesson to all of us to feel good about ourselves no matter what other people think or how they react to us.  Who we are is enough and being true to ourselves is the most important lesson we need to learn. He ran back into the jungle several times to try to save his friend – he saved as many as he could and finally found his friend.  It was obvious that Baba was going to die because of his injuries but Forrest picked him up and took him out of the jungle despite artillery blasting around him the whole time.  He was told to stop.  He didn’t.  His loyalty to his friend was what he lived at that moment.

He has few friends and few supporters.  He never gives up on people and has an innate understanding of people – Jenny, the party girl for whom he cares about his whole life, his captain who is furious about losing his legs.   Forrest is always there to love and care for Jenny when she needs it – not to judge.  His captain whom he rescued is given a whole new lease on life.  They come to him because they know how accepting he is of who they are, not what they have done or said or what parts are missing.  He inspires and motivates others to be the best of who they are – including those who join him on his treks across the US.

I encourage you – if you are one of those people who doesn’t feel so good about yourself – to get this movie – to really, really watch it intently and to put yourself in Forrest Gump’s shoes – walk in his shoes in your imagination – try to feel what he must feel – feel what it must be like to be Forrest Gump.  If you do, you’ll begin to understand what it means to feel good about yourself no matter what. This man did the best he could with what he had – and what a life!

Feel it – feel good about yourself.  There will be another understanding which comes across –  everyone on earth is valuable – there couldn’t be a “star” if there was no one to applaud!  There is no one on earth who is “ordinary” – we are all extraordinary and that’s the truth.

I hope you will take the time to get a copy of this movie or watch it on tv – it’s on quite often – and watch it the way you have probably have never watched it before – not as a good movie by an excellent cast but as a life lesson.

For all people who are not feeling good about themselves, this is a way to understand what that looks like, how it feels and how to “process the world” with all its ups and downs.  The most important conviction we can nurture for ourselves – feeling good about oneself no matter the slings and arrows thrown our way – I can’t but think how Jenny’s life would have been so different had she been more like Forrest.

Lorraine Arams
Part of feeling good about yourself,
is getting the life you want. If you have
never achieved your goals before, try
this new system – complimentary for you

How To Learn Faster and Easier

How can you learn faster and easier than reading books?

Books are fine – I love books!  But when we’re learning something new which is more conceptual than factual, it takes a lot of time.  Subjects like chemistry, stats, mathematics, etc are more easily learned in books than is a topic such as managing people, managing your career, etc.

However, books are a good starting point. This is a way to get the “vocabulary” of the subject you’re interested in learning – and certainly teachers and instructors clarify what is contained in books.

Often overlooked is going to direct sources of information.  Not the internet.  Not the librarian.  Not your friend.

Let’s say a person is mid-way in their career and that person has decided that their career needs a boost.  Often this person will go to the internet and learn from others there which is fine except you really never know who you are learning from – are these people truly knowledgeable or have they just regurgitated material they have found in books and on the net?

Often, as most people do, the most obvious resource is often not utilized. Whether you’re working for government, non-profits or corporations, you get to know names of people who are successful or at least appear to be successful in their careers.  If you’re in that situation and want to give your career a boost,  contact these people and ask them if they could provide a few pointers to help.

The same goes for anything else you want to learn – go directly to the source – – the person who is successful in that area.  Talk to them.  Most will be happy to help.  Some won’t.  Some people are not interested in helping others – they figure they did it the hard way, so should everyone else.  However, the majority of successful people will help others.

For instance, if you’re interested in creating a little extra income on the internet, start with helpful people. Here’s an example. You’ll be amazed how simple it can be but if you tried researching online or reading massive amounts of information, it would be very time consuming and discouraging.

How do you learn faster and easier?  Talk directly to successful people in  your area of interest.  It’s that simple:

  • prepare some good questions ahead of time
  • develop really, really good listening and reflective listening skills
  • call up several people you are aware of who are successful to make appointments (take them out for lunch or coffee – people are more willing to talk longer over lunch or coffee)
  • meet with them – be polite, not aggressive
  • most importantly – send them a thank you after the meeting AND
  • keep in touch with them – let them know how you have utilized their advice and how it has helped you – it’s a great way to build your network

There are some highly competitive arenas in which people are less willing to help others as they are protecting their “territories” and jobs, but, even there, you’ll find some good souls willing to talk about their successes.

Learning faster and easier is all about learning directly from other people.

Lorraine Arams
Arrive at your goals faster
and easier – get your complimentary
system at

Does Mortality Factor into Time Management?

Does mortality factor into time management?  It should.  Why?

Because when people are faced the finite reality of their time on earth, it is amazing how attitudes change about how they are spending their time on earth.  It is amazing how flowers, trees and things and people  they really love really come into focus – they don’t want to spend their time any longer experiencing the parts of life which they don’t enjoy.

It is a reality of the human condition – we are all going to die – when?  Nobody knows – it could be today, tomorrow or 50 years from now –

If you knew you were going to die 3 years from now, would you be spending your time the way you are now? If not, what would you change?  What’s preventing you from changing now?

If you are spending your time doing what you want to do, then you are one of the few lucky people on earth.  Most people stay with what they’ve got no matter how much they dislike it – the job provides the security they seek, the spouse provides the stability, the family members are tolerated just in case they’re needed somewhere along the line, colleagues are entertained when these same people would never be friends and a host of other activities are encompassed within the boundaries of time – just in case there might be a benefit at some future date.

Why?  The life they want is not something they have – better to keep what you have then risk the unknown. Yet . . . . there is always a longing . . . . and there is always “I must, I must, I must” – it keeps people in a frenzy of activity – spending time with people they don’t particularly like, doing things for others they don’t want to do and being places where they don’t want to be.

If a people keep fighting against themselves, then there is a constant trying to “catch up” to themselves. They think if they fill their nights and days with enough activity, they won’t notice all the things they are doing they don’t really want to do!

How do you think that is different from someone whose main objective is to do all they enjoy, be with the people they really like and go places where they really want to be?  Can you feel the calmness in that approach . . . . we all can but more often than not we do the opposite.

If you did factor in your mortality, what would you be doing? Would you be spending your time living the life you want or living the life you think will deliver what you only imagine?  How disappointed will you be if people don’t deliver?  What if you’re fired – what if your spouse leaves you – what if your family won’t support you when you need it – what if your colleagues stab you in the back?  What will you have left?

How would you be spending your time today if you factored in your own mortality?

Lorraine Arams
Goals are living the life the you want
Get this new system at

Did something special happen for you on Monday? It did for me

Monday this week had a surprise waiting for me.  I opened my email and there was a special and unique communication waiting for me – my inclusion in USA Today article by Andrea Kay – and it made my day!  A little thing in a big publication and I am very grateful!

It was special!  I responded to a request and, voila!  international exposure!

Andrea Kay is a well-known career consultant who authored, “Life’s a Bitch and Then You Change Careers: 9 steps to get out of your funk and on to your future.”

Two people, connected by the web, and each contributing something to one another – what better human connection could there be!

Monday – something special did happen on many levels – it happened for me and it can happen for you – through one of the greatest communication tools we’ve ever had – the web.

Lorraine Arams
Communicate your dreams to
yourself – every day – with a
goal setting system that works

It’s Friday – What Does It Mean for You?

It’s Friday – what does that mean for you? 

Does it mean two days off or does it mean more work or does it mean chaos or does it mean spending time with friends and family or does it mean a chance to regroup or does it mean, at last, a day to sleep in soon?

For many people, Friday is not the end of the week but the beginning – they work different hours, different shifts.  For others it is the end of the week.  So if start of the week Friday person meets up with end of the week Friday person, they’ll see Friday’s quite differently!

Either way, Friday is a new opportunity – a new day – the good news is that you’re here to experience it.  The bad news could be your attitude – how you face either day first thing will make it a bad or a good day – it’s your choice!  Yep – your choice!  What do you choose – make it a great day or mumble and moan?

Friday can be a great day or a downer day – what does it mean to you?  Opportunity or “the same old, same old”?  How do you want to spend those 24 little hours?

Lorraine Arams
You know where you’re going
when you have goals; get a new
goal setting system here:

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